Thursday, February 17, 2011


The story continues, if you missed the first part, please go here

For a moment I thought I would pass out, but I didn’t, I couldn’t. Not now...

I held the paper with trembling hands. I felt everything... anger, betrayal, resentment... I had been hurt by my confidant, my soul mate, my best friend, my husband...

With another bang on the bedroom door, I jolted back to the present. There was no need to fight anymore, this battle has been won. I was holding in my hands the stone that’ll knock these goliaths dead for life, all I had to do was sling it with my last energy and so I headed for the door.

Just then, I heard a voice.

Stopping in my tracks, I listened as it became louder...

Like someone possessed with some kind of demon, I spun around, holding my ears. The voice was mine... the words I had spoken years before were replaying so loudly... “For better, for worse, in sickness and in health, through good and bad times...” the vow I read heartily. NOOOOOOOO!!!

And then I stopped to think, just as I whispered ‘Lord, teach me to apply wisdom’.

Moments later, I slowly unlocked the bedroom door as I pulled out my travelling bag, ready to leave. My feet had found strength again. Amidst the rain of abuses from my in-laws, I headed for my car. And then before getting in, I looked at them all once again, letting out a weak smile, I shook my head.

As I got in, I looked at the papers again. If only they knew... maybe... just maybe... but I couldn’t tell them, I couldn’t show them the different medical reports confirming my husband’s impotence. Reports he had tucked away in his VID bag... all 4 of them, hidden from me all through the years. I loved him too much to let this secret out, and even though this hurts so badly, I was going to cover his shame, because that is what you do for the one you love.

If you were in her shoes, would you be able to forgive your husband for keeping such a huge secret? Would you show them (your in-laws) the reports and let out the secret that your husband has been shooting blanks? Or would you ask him upon his return to disclose his condition?
What would you do?



kitkat said...

hmm... interesting
but i though the husband is dead already?

Anonymous said...

ha! the things we do for love!

Mrs O said...

have just landed here and not sure if this is a real story or not?! Someone fill me in - i'm gripped!

P.E.T. Projects said...

Kitkat - the husband is not dead, he's been away from home on a biz trip

NG - yes, the things we do for love... but did she make the right decision?

Mrs O - its just fiction. I'm trying to find out people's opinion: would u go this lenght for love? would u hide his shame or just save urself from the ridicule by telling everyone who cares to listen that ur husband is shooting blanks?

omoba-adeteju! said...

hmmmmmmmmmmm, am really lost for words..
"the things we do for love"
for me, i will confront my hubby when he returns o
it is hard you know, but for love's sake, i will cover his shame!!!
well done, nice one!!!

Naijamum said...

As a Christain, I should say I will confront him and we will talk things through.

However, considering the culture we come from - where women are blamed if a couple remain childless; the fact that he has kept this info from his wife is unforgivable.

Truly, from the moment those papers were discovered the marriage is finished.

Love ko, Amore ni *hisssss*

Anonymous said...

is it right? you asked...i will answer;I DUNNO, because when it comes to the matter of the heart, it can't not be explained in black or white.. if i was the one, i would definitely confront him, then tell my own family, but it's up to him to tell his own family. We can either work at a compromise IF i still love him or seek for divorce IF i don't love him again.

T.Notes said...

For better or worse,in SICKNESS or in health....abi?!Lol!
Nice write-up-I've clearly been missing out on this tale!!!Checking out the backlogs!

Taurusscholar said...

Maybe I've just never experienced the kind of love you're referring to. But why would I protect someone who obviously doesn't respect me enough to be honest with me about his impotence? Someone who'd make me go through years of worrying about incapabilities and insecurities that weren't mine to begin with? Someone who wasn't man enough to shield me from his crazy family? Like I said...maybe I just don't know that type of love, but hell will freeze over before I let him get away with it.

P.E.T. Projects said...

@Omoba-Adeteju: now that u've decided to protect his name, will you force him to tell his relatives?

@Naijamum: its a tough one, if love could speak, im sure it will protest this once.

@Ibhade: Hmmmm, wisdom speaks! 'COMPROMISE' that word can bring tears.

@T-Notes: Sickness AND in health... maybe thats why people are rewriting their vows these days... no?

@Taurusscholar: A guy would do anything to keep his ego intact not so? But they say one should love unconditionally now???

Lara said...

I will cover his shame, but will not remain in that marriage.

For if he could keep such secret away from me, he does not believe in me and can never earn my trust again.

Gbemisoke said...

Witholding info from a love interest that could affect their decision to marry you is just wrong.
Knowingly deceiving a spouse by hiding impotence is even worse.
He owes her a duty to tell her. The decision to stay with him or walk is hers to make.
It's a different matter altogether if he didn't know. In this case he did and that's the real issue here - DECEPTION, not his impotence.
If I were in her shoes, I'll wait till he returns and calmly, without any drama, show him the evidence, giving him an opportunity to explain himself. If I'm satisfied with what he has to say, and am willing to forgive him and work our issues out, seeing as I love him and have already invested so much into the marriage, I would give him the option of telling his folks himself or having me tell them. That way, I don't have to deal with their drama and we can move on from there, knowing that NOTHING is impossible with God. If he insists on not telling them, he'll have to shield me from them, but I doubt that option would work, seeing as things have already degenerated to the stage of hostility and being thrown out by them.
Love covers a multitude of sins, so there's hope. He just needs to prove that he's worthy of her love by fighting to regain her trust.

Rita said...

If she has found out, she should discuss it with her man in a reassuring way. She does not need to tell the in-laws. Forgiveness is not something that comes to us naturally...but maybe when she hears his side of the story, and understand that most likely he was "afraid" to tell her, she might be able to forgive him. And if they decide to stick together, they might just overcome the challenge. No one else has to know...

The Corner Shop said...

Yikes!! This is not a cool situation oh! Yeah, they should discuss it. But if it were me, i'd insist he owns up let them leave me alone please.


Chizy K said...

Nigerians need to embrace adoption seriously whats wrong with people. If i were her i'd talk to my husband about it, 2 heads are better than one.
Adoption or even other means of non complicated means are available even in Nigeria

Daughter of Her King said...

I agree with gbemisoke... In addition to that, love is a decision not a feeling.... It really is a very complex situation. Funny enough, i thought impotence means that the man cannot stand up at all??? So I question if one would not be able to tell that a man cant or can stand whilst courting. Although, not encouraging premarital sex... Honesty is the best policy...

Having said that the dude might actually have his own demons that he has been fighting with not able to communicate. In short, as long as God is in the marriage, there is a way out.... All is not lost... After all, this life is a journey... But I will recommend that women ask their potential partner key qs and carry out tests... whatever the case, I dont support divorce, so this is when my faith comes in.. I don't believe in running away.

Dealing with the issue is key for me, sha if it was the other way round, I would expect the man to stay... adoption is a great option, all hope is not lost...